I feel like lately I've let this blog kind of scrape by with my Friday features to help remind me to write a bit, and I've been trying to figure out what topic I could possibly find that would give me a forum to speak my mind. Well I finally found one: chapstick addiction. Now, I realize I am far from the first to address this issue (Lip Balm Anonymous seems to be the main hub for this topic.) But I feel like I need to add my voice to the others crying out "Put the chapstick down and slowly back away." Too many people I know (girls especially) are obsessed with their chapstick/lip balm/carmex/lip gloss/etc and are in constant need of re-application. If the anti-sun/skin cancer people could get people to reapply this obsessively they could stop cranking out weird commercials where the sun is chasing people. These lip products come in many shapes and sizes. Sticks, tubes, squeeze bottles, that thing that looks like a giant Q-tip. But they all share one common characteristic -- they all create dependencies in their users.
Now I'll admit up front that I am not a user of the products mentioned above and perhaps that would make me unqualified to give my opinion on the subject, but I don't smoke and am firmly in the anti-smoking camp, both for my own benefits as for those of the smoker. In this case, I think both of those topics apply. I personally am tired of seeing people bemoan, in Napoleon Dynamite-like fashion, the fact that they've forgotten their chapstick and does someone please have some they can borrow? People who won't share a soda can, have no problem sharing chapstick with another person. Not that I have some, but I get tired of the questions. And seriously, can you really need chapstick that bad? Some people even have those sleeve things that they hook on to their keys (don't get me started on the ginormous keychain conglomeration that some people carry) that carry their chapstick for them everywhere. I can conceive of people's lips getting chapped in the wintertime, but year-round, all-day, non-stop chappiness? I'm having a hard time buying that. Even people who are too obese to leave the house don't need to eat all day long. I never thought they would become our example of moderation.
I've heard (as yet unsubstantiated) rumors that some lip balm makers put shredded glass in their products that actually make your lips chapped, making users want to keep on using the product. Whether this is true or not, something's going on that makes people unable to function without their chapstick, and it needs to stop. Heaven forbid your lips not actually be greased up like the proverbial pig for a few moments. And if you really can't survive without the taste of cherry on your lips 24-7, you might just consider seeking professional help.
Are there any addicts out there who can offer me some kind of explanation for this obsession?
9 comments:
I have an aversion to the un-greased feeling and if I can have chapstick, then I will. Why is it a big deal if it's something that's cheap and offers comfort, too, to people like me?
So you're saying it hasn't yet reached the urgent need stage? I just, in general, am opposed to things that leave their users with withdrawal symptoms (caffeinated beverages for example). For some reason I keep getting this image of an old lady in a nursing home crying for a nurse to please come put some chapstick on her lips.
And by "un-greased", don't you mean "normal"?
Anyway, please realize this was more of a gripe than a serious concern for me, although I do cringe when I see girls using the death squeeze in hopes of ekeing out one more drop of lip gloss from some plastic tube that they never let out of their sight.
Haven't you see the movie "Clueless"? Girls want to call attention to their lips so you'll want to kiss them. Duh!
I'm addicted to Mint Chapstick. It's probably the glass shards' fault. Only now the Chapstick people don't make Mint flavor anymore, so I have to go with Spearmint. I could have sworn you were depicting me in this post, because I won't share glasses, toothbrushes, sandwiches, but if I am in dire need of moistened lips, I will borrow Chapstick. It kind of makes me want to go on a week-with-no-Chapstick kick to see how things work out. And I'm off to unchap right now.....
Shawn and Lindsay,
I actually can't say that I've seen Clueless, at least not all of it, and what I saw I only saw once, so I don't recall that. And since when did guys need encouragement to want to kiss girls?
Oh, and btw, Lindsay, sorry about the Lance Bass news. I know you were always a big fan.
I have to say that I think it's gross when people don't wear chapstick. The only exception to that is when people drink enough water, thus making their lips naturally supple. If someone has the kind of lips that flake and get the white buildup on the corners, then they need to do those of us who have to look at their lips a favor and put some chapstick on.
I personally only like one kind of chapstick. It's called 'natural ice.' It's made with mentholatum and I like it because I don't get the withdrawl symptoms. I only use it when I my lips need some lubrication. I don't have the need to use it all the time. It does the job chapsticks were meant to do.
True, I guess all addiction is bad. Very, very, very bad. Where is my Diet Coke?
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