Thursday, January 12, 2006

Jake Needs...

So one of the blogs that I keep on list of ones I check daily had a post recently entitled "Claire Needs" and then showed how much fun it is to go to Google and type "Jake needs" or whatever your name might be and then look at the phrases that come up. Let me just say it was a lot of fun to see what the world at large thinks that I need. :)

Here's some of the top results that I found:

(Results in orange. My comments in blue.)

Jake needs to make changes -- someone's obviously been paying attention

Jake needs financial backing -- not sure for what, but I wouldn't say no

Jake needs a vacation -- its sad that I need one this shortly after returning from 3 weeks off, but luckily Martin Luther King, Jr. day is just around the corner.

Jake needs someone who can show him love, spoil him, hug him, kiss him, and show him life can be all that -- would be scary in its accuracy were it not part of a pet adoption ad

Jake needs someone to love him -- ibid

Jake needs to jack it up -- actually I tend to have no problem jacking things up

Jake needs more backstory -- you mean the thrilling story of how I won the Grantsville Middle School Geography Bee in back-to-back years isn't enough to hold your attention?

Jake needs a yard -- if only to have a place to put up the American flag kit that my parents gave me for Christmas

Jake needs 2 pints of milk for a cake -- and of course the motivation to cook

Jake needs three pegs to win the game -- if I can get down to one peg, I hear I can get into Mensa

Jake needs help -- in so many ways

Jake needs a wake-up call -- I prefer breakfast in bed, but I guess this would be okay

Jake needs to realize that he's an amateur at this media thing -- just when I had more than one reader of my blog

Jake needs some fast money -- its for my fast offering

Jake needs to spread delivery over four months -- I always forget to manage expectations

Jake needs to make some vital changes in key areas -- if only I knew which areas and which changes

Jake needs to know the URL patterns in order to make a link -- I actually can do this pretty well on my own

Jake needs Joey for moral support -- is it still on Thursday nights?

Jake needs $100 -- in addition to the fast money and financial backing mentioned earlier, a crisp Benjamin would be nice.

Jake needs a cyber > date -- I do not! (I mean the thought has crossed my mind, but still...)

Jake needs a quiet home to go to so he can relax and stretch his little cat legs -- they get so tired after all the ball of yarn chasing

Jake needs a hairstyle -- I think thats debatable

Jake needs us, but he also needs someone else -- and thats why I'm still looking

If you made it this far, I commend you, and suggest you do the same if you are looking for some cheap laughs. Feel free to stick in the name of someone else once you get tired.

4 comments:

Kirsten J said...

Just did the needs challenge. According to Google, I need to start getting dirty, and then in the next entry I need to shower and wear some makeup! Also, I need help and I need to grow up. True and true. That was fun. Thanks.

Adam said...

"Jake needs to spread delivery over four months -- I always forget to manage expectations"

That was excellent.

Here's what I got:
Adam needs extensive counseling for this anger, frustration and depression.
Adam needs a lot more help than all of us combined could ever give him!
Adam needs needs serious help before he snaps. Adam needs to
either stop drinking alltogether or limit the amounts that he drinks.
Adam needs very firm rules, expectations, limits, and consequences. ... To help
him succeed, Adam needs to be the youngest child in his new home

After that I was too depressed. Look at all my failings, right there on Google!

Smartie said...

Jake, I got one you'll appreciate: "Emily Needs a Gangsta. It's no secret that Emily loves her hip-hop. After showing us a few fly girl techniques ..."

Does Google have a camera following me around??

Geobadger said...

I found this to be much more fun than expected:

George Needs a Potty Break
George Needs to Put Laura in her Place
George Needs Anchor Management
George Needs a Good Smack
George needs a better understanding
of basic government.
George Needs Help! Please Assist
George NEEDS to fix this situation
George needs your forgiveness and encouragement on a daily basis
George needs the money
St. George needs better movie theaters!!!
George needs to calculate the duty cycle for readout of the guide stars
Curious George Needs You
George needs fresh water
St.George needs a decent radio station!
George needs to restart the DHCP server and initiate scavenging.
George needs a wee-wee

I stopped when it came full circle!